Night life

Video: Cow Herd Invades Miami Neighborhood Under Cover of Darkness

Imagine: You’re sipping your habitual glass of warm milk before bedtime when you discern the unmistakable sound of animal hooves on asphalt. Lots of animal hooves. When you look out your window, you see the cause of the ruckus. It’s a small herd of Holstein cows, trundling down your suburban street.

What sounds like a literal fever dream was real life for residents of a Miami Lakes neighborhood on Thursday night.

In a video posted on Instagram by a neighbor and shared by Only In Dade, more than a dozen cows can be seen trotting down a palm tree-lined street, escorted by Miami-Dade police. Neighbors stare in amazement and hold up phone cameras, their giggles audible over the clickety-clack of the herd.

“That is crazy, oh my God!” one neighbor says in disbelief. Another, watching with arms crossed, cracks a dad joke to the police escort: “They’re trespassing!” 

“What level of Jumanji is this?” one person commented beneath Only In Dade’s post.

“Part of the Miami Lakes Reyes Magos Parade?” another wrote, followed by the shrug emoji.

In a separate video posted by the neighbor, several cows are seen standing in a front yard, munching on what appears to be a bush under the glare of patrol car headlights. Two uniformed officers stand by, seemingly bewildered.

“Free my boys they did nothing wrong,” the poster captioned the video, which is followed by a photo of what appears to be cow manure splattered on the ground.

It’s unclear where the cows came from, how they may have escaped, or whether they’re still on the lam. The Miami-Dade Police Department did not respond to emailed questions about the nighttime cattle drive. 

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